Daphne Guinnes, Style.com

Any woman that knows who she is, feels comfortable in her own skin, has a wardrobe that reflects her personality, flair, and doesn’t compromise, has an advantage that cannot be faked. This woman moves differently than those who are still looking for themselves and genuinely knows how to celebrate other stylish and successful women.

For some, a personal style comes naturally – it can be associated with how well they know and like themselves. For others, they have to create their own style. To do so successfully, there’s work and research involved. There are too many women out there who are compulsively shopping without knowing who they are. Women who know their style tend to stay away from the ‘It’ bags and trendy pieces.

If you are 30 years old or older, and you don’t know your personal style, we need to work on that, sister. It doesn’t mean that the style you’ll acquire won’t ever change. If it’s authentic, it will just grow with you and you won’t need massive self-makeovers every few years. There’s a certain coolness to having a dress or a coat for 10 years that always fits with your wardrobe.

Carmel Snow, Editor-in-Chief Harper's Bazaar 1934-58

Finding your own style requires work, so you need to do your homework. There’s a McDonald’s ad on bulletin boards across America that shows three different kinds of fatty breakfast sandwiches, and it reads, “Three reasons to get up in the morning”. These better not be your reasons. Yours should be more like this:

1.Who are your favorite fashion icons?

- Find one from the 20’s-30’s, another from the 50’s-60’s and the third from today.

2.Who are you favorite fashion designers?

- When you have your answers, ask yourself why and what that designer has done – research their histories. If you have three, you’ll have more work to do…

3.Who do you want to be?

- What you resist is often what persists…So, if you are afraid of becoming your mother – you probably will become her, sorry.

If your favorite fashion icon is Daphne Guinnes, and your favorite fashion designer is Marc Jacobs, find out how you relate to them and what you love about their designs and styles.

Marc Jacobs, Style.com

This is your first step.

To be continued….